WHEN YOU’VE BEEN THERE
You never really lose the part of you that once rode an ambulance, responded to critical calls, lost sleep because someone was frightened about a pain that they had for hours. You never forget the feeling of pronouncing someone (or waiting for the medical examiner to do the same). The crushing pain you felt when some young teen’s mother cried on your shoulder. Once you’ve been EMS, you will always carry that part of you inside.
It really doesn’t matter if you’ve been paid or volunteer, you will always remember the good and the bad calls. It’s just as hard to forget the first time you delivered a baby, as it is to forget the crying family standing around you when CPR on their loved one is called. It doesn’t matter if you’ve been in EMS for five or thirty years.
Even in “retirement”, you’ll feel your pulse speed up a bit when you hear an emergency siren. Every time you pass an accident scene, you can’t resist watching the emergency responders as they wheel their patient to a rig… and of course you’ll turn to the person next to you and tell them how you would have “done it”. And you will probably be super critical of every TV show that shows (fictional) ambulance response.
Riding an ambulance gives you a truly different perspective about life. It changes you. You will often find yourself feeling more kinship with your EMS partners than your own family – simply because you’ve shared literal life-or-death experiences. But riding an ambulance can be challenging to forget the “highs” and deal with the “lows”. You’ll want to share your experiences with your spouse/partner, but unless they are in the field, they might not understand your moods.
The one person you often forget that needs your help, your passion, and your understanding is YOU. It’s vital that you find HEALTHY ways to cope with the things you’ve seen that haunt you. It’s important to remember that you, just like your patients, are only human beings – both mentally and physically you need to take care of yourself. You need to get rest, eat well, and above all, know your limits (physically and emotionally).
If you are hurt on the job, or have nightmares about a call, it is vitally important that you get the necessary care. Decades ago, it was considered normal to shelve the pain and hide it from others. In today’s world we have more of an understanding if a responder needs help, physically or mentally. When that time comes, you may have to be strong enough to realize that you need to leave the field. Even Superman had his Kryptonite.
Find out what programs your agency offers such as counseling, singular or group. Sometimes it helps to speak to your peers, clergy, or counselor. Treat yourself with the same care you try to give your patients. Sometimes it’s hard with back-to-back calls, but always, take time to breathe.
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